Set Yourself Up for Success with Double Vision

I’ve been teaching women how to set ambitious and creative goals. On my latest webinar, I talked about my own story of doing too many things (which included a freelance design company, a research collaborative, a startup, an empowerment bootcamp for women, a speaker series-a pop-up dinner club…. Oh yeah and I was teaching myself hand lettering at the time.)

Whew.

In truth, it was really exhausting.

I was working all the time, but I never seemed to be moving forward. I felt like I was constantly spiraling.

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What if You Could Have More of What You Wanted?

“Sometimes I think I just want to quit my job and become a potter.”

I hear women’s inner dialogues about the tradeoffs they face all the time.

And one of the things I’ve learned from hearing these inner negotiations, these wrestles with reality, is just how often women force themselves into false choices.

We tell ourselves things like we can be good moms or have powerful careers—but I’ve seen women who decided that they would have both, find their own way to do it, even if it meant pushing against their workplace, finding a better workplace, or inventing their own.

It’s not a black-or-white opting in or opting out—it’s opting in on the terms you want—or at least the best you can get.

Which is usually more than you think if you’re willing to try.

These kind of black-and-white, this-or-that narratives are rampant in the thinking of women who do more than one thing creatively, especially when it comes to success, recognition, money and stability.

I need to stop playing and get serious about my career.

People like me, people who are creative, don’t make money.

I either choose creativity or stability.

And the problem with that kind of thinking—that opt-in or opt-out mentality for people with lots creative passions, is that we don’t ask ourselves how we can have more of all the things we want. We just accept that we can have either or.

We accept these limiting narratives about success and then opt-in or opt-out, choosing a pre-scripted path in which we give up the things that make us feel safe, or the things that make us feel like we’re growing. And then we load shame and blame on top of that—

I’m not disciplined enough to have focus.

I’ve sold out.

I’ll never be successful.

It makes us want to escape. It makes us want to lose ourselves in a fantasy-life, and Instagram-perfect picture that represents for us all the things we want, that we either left behind on the road, or feel like we’ll never access.

What if you didn’t have to choose? What if you could have more of what you wanted instead of giving up before you try?

What if you didn’t have to figure it out alone? What if you could learn from other women’s pathways?

What if you could stop that endless cycle of mind-chatter and feel good about what you’re doing in your career and with your interests and passions? What if you felt at peace, and energized?

Let me be frank—a successful multipassionate life doesn’t mean you don’t have to choose—it means you choose intelligently, strategically, what’s right for you.

This week I’ll be opening my next Accelerator program Double Vision which helps women with multiple passions set goals that respect their creativity—and help them achieve more success and peace of mind. I’ll be hosting a webinar on Ambitious Creative Goal Setting just in time for the holiday season when you’ll want to be reflecting on what you want out of next year. Join me on Wednesday, December 13th at 1pm EST.

Is Your Analysis Paralysis Holding You Back? Growth Hack #3

I’m writing this week about some of the ways I see women get lost in the crowd and slow down their career growth.

How many times have you seen a woman raise her hand timidly in a meeting… and then make a suggestion in that baby girl voice.. trailing off at the end into a question?

When that happens, here’s what we hear:

“What if we [this is a good time to zone out because this is just a filler comment] maybe, you know, changed our marketing focus [this must a bad idea because she doesn’t even believe it] from Live Journal to Facebook?” [hmmm…. Would it look bad it I took another cookie?]

Leaders make choices. They take positions.

Sometimes they’re wrong and sometimes they’re right.

But they’re willing to take a stand instead of dithering.

Do you dither? Do you hesitate to speak up? Do you have a hard time making decisions? That might be why you’re getting lost in the crowd.

I’m a reformed wishy washy decision maker….. Yes, of the paper-plastic variety. I can see all the possibilities—which is sometimes a great skill for a creative….but that knowledge used to make me get overwhelmed and frozen. Unable to choose. A

I was so, so afraid of getting it wrong.

But I unlearned that habit because I knew it was holding me back. And it not only supersized my career growth, it made my life better as well.

 

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Are You Too Exhausted to “Lean In?” Growth Hack #2

Yeah, yeah, you’ve heard the advice—lean in, lean in!

But do you ever think, that’s just so much flipping work….?

hughhhhh (exhausted sigh.)

Maybe you’re a working mom, working the ‘double shift…’ no, wait, it’s probably more like the triple shift—working a long day, coming home to take care of your family, and then logging in a few more hours at night. Or maybe you’re balancing putting in the hours while you pay your dues…study for professional development tests……and then go out multiple times a week to check your networking box.

I just got so exhausted writing this, I had to take a break.

But now I’m back…. With the second way I see women get lost in the crowd and slow down their career growth.

I see a lot of exhausted women come through Build Yourself Workshop…. And I see a lot of exhausted women decline to take Build Yourself, because they’re so exhausted they feel they just don’t have the time.

But I’ve also seen women break through.

I’ve seen the busy business owner take the time upfront to hire a project manager—it felt like she’d never make the time to hire—but once she did, it took less time than she thought to find the right person. And doing so allowed her to show up at 100% for the high-level clients she was booking.

I’ve seen the working mother get a promotion—and go home in time to be with her daughter. And she told me she had time to craft. To CRAFT? What working mother you know who has time to craft?

So what’s the secret? These women are working smarter not harder.

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Are You Getting Lost in the Crowd at Work?

Feeling like your career growth has stalled out?  Are you getting lost in the crowd? Stuck in the mid-career malaise, the sea of shiny faces at the bottom of the pyramid?

We all know the feeling of waiting to be picked….  And sometimes our careers feel that way—whether it’s hoping we’ll get put on the growth track at our companies, or hoping our dream clients will say yes.

Over the next few days, I’m going to be writing about some of the ways I see women get lost in the crowd and slow down their career growth.

One of those ways, is they look backwards and not forwards.

What I mean by that is that every day, at work, they behave like the person they are in their career now.

Well, duh? I am the person I am now, right? Are you about to get really meta on me?

Uh, yeah. Just a little.

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They’re sitting right next to you.

Today, I wanted to share three stories that I’ve collected on what it can feel like to be a woman or person of color in my field – architecture. Names and identifying details have been altered, but the basic structure of these stories is true—and they are recent. They are not from the 1950s or 1960s, they are from today.

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Confidence Hack #3: Make the Investment

When I first started my business, I found myself staring down an empty work calendar. I was totally unbooked–except for one tiny little workshop gig. I didn’t know how to get work, I didn’t know what I what I was selling. I had no clue what to say at cocktail parties.

I felt like an impostor.

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My Business Name is My Wingwoman

I’ve written to you before about how I see issues of confidence as the #1 thing that holds women back from their full potential — no matter where they are in their career — it just shows up in different ways.

For that reason, I’ll soon be releasing Defeat Self Doubt, a mini course that I’ve created to help you put self doubt to the side. It will help you rewire your brain for more confidence and ease. Rewiring your brain is all about little hacks that help you build a new reality that you first start to live–then start to believe. Over the next few weeks I want to share with you a few hacks that I used to do that for myself, especially when starting my business–which was imposter syndrome central for me.

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